From Pain to Praise

I woke up staring at the ceiling while sharp pains radiated through my lower back and down my leg. Every movement felt like a shock through my body.

And honestly… I felt defeated.

I had just finished the Whole30, something that felt like such a victory for me. I had been feeling amazing in my body—no aches, no pains, more energy than I had felt in a long time. So to suddenly wake up in this kind of pain felt discouraging.

In 2022, I was in a car accident that injured my back. The doctors warned me that there would likely be flare-ups from time to time. Still, knowing that doesn’t make the moment any easier when the pain actually comes.

This time it was bad.

I needed help just to get out of bed. I needed help getting dressed. Eventually, I found myself using my Dad’s walker just to move around the house.

And that’s when the tears really came.

Not just from the pain—but from the memories.

Using that walker brought me right back to the days when I helped my Dad out of bed. I remembered the exhaustion, the love, the responsibility, and the quiet strength it took to care for him. Then I heard my son say he didn’t think he was strong enough to help me, and it broke my heart a little—because I remembered feeling the exact same way when I was caring for my Dad.

Suddenly the pain in my body and the grief in my heart collided all at once.

Lying there in my bed, questions began to rise up in my mind. One question lingered louder than the others:

“Why me, Lord? Why do I have to suffer when it comes to my body? If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Why, Lord?”

And almost immediately, the doubts followed behind those questions. You know the ones—the whispers that try to pull your heart into a spiral of discouragement.

But something was different this time.

When those thoughts came, I heard myself respond in a way I hadn’t before:

“That does not align with who I know God to be.”

Scripture reminds us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 to “take every thought captive to obey Christ.” 

So that’s exactly what I began to do. One thought at a time, I surrendered them to the Lord.

Instead of letting the spiral continue, I started praying.

I asked the Lord to heal my back.

I thanked Him for being present with me in the pain.

I asked Him to give me strength for the moment I was in.

Because even in suffering, Scripture reminds us that God is near.

As I laid there, another thought began to settle in my heart.

What if all of these trials—the ones I’ve already walked through and the ones I’m still walking through—are shaping something deeper in me?

What if they are teaching me to trust Him more?

To depend on Him more?

To rely on Him more?

What if the invitation in the pain is simply this:

To choose Him.

Job declared in the middle of unimaginable suffering, “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21).

And even through tears, discomfort, and questions… I find myself echoing the same words today:

Blessed be the name of the Lord.